(no subject)

[llyrafantasyfae]

 After crying my eyes out, and then getting a little kitty cuddle therapy.  I tried to make sense out of what was going on exactly in my head and why I was so crazy upset about it.
This is what I came up with. Of course I may just be showing how crazy I really am....
I have no one around here that understand my passion. My husband tolerates it but I am fairly certain he thinks I am odd too. I miss San Diego for that fact. One of my good friends who I absolutely admire lived just down the street, and its where I was introduced to the masquerades and that whole angle of costuming. Out here.. nada... Until Halloween... but mostly its, "oh, she still plays dress up.*sneer*" So when I go to Costume College I am excited to be surrounded by others "like" me.  But then I run into my own insecurities. mandie_rw put it perfectly. Paraphrased only slightly. I haven't got the guts to go talk to a group of costumers who are clearly WAY more fabulous than I will ever hope to be. They all know each other and don't really need another mediocre seamstress around, especially such an awkward, introverted one.

And I don't want to act like everyone is mean and snobbish there. I know they are hanging out with friends that they see maybe once a year, so lots of catch up and what not, not just ignoring. Okay I think I am just rambling but thats what I came up with.  

Comments

[gilded-garb.livejournal.com]

I want to hang out with you! I got to talk to you a little bit on the bus to the fabric tour last year, but it's hard to socialize during something like that. I'll be honest - I have a hard time connecting faces with names so I feel like a total heel going up to someone I think I recognize and saying, "Hey, do I know you?" I also have a hard time remembering people's real names, so there's that too.

I totally get where you're coming from though. Sometimes I look at the people I hang out with at Costume College and wonder why such fabulous costumers are willing to be seen with me. So you're not alone in that insecurity!

[mandie-rw.livejournal.com]

I adore the way you paraphrased me. XD

And nope, not crazy! You make sense - I think it does help to have someone local, or at least within driving distance, that you can get together and geek out together with. Once a year and Halloween isn't enough!

[koshka-the-cat.livejournal.com]

I enjoyed getting to see you last year!

And I feel lucky to have a good group of friends who go every year. I have a hard time going up to people and saying something too. I know I don't look it at Costume College, but that's only because of that group of friends. I've always had issues with shyness.

You know me and my group, at least. Remember that!

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

Thanks for commenting. Sometimes its nice to know I am not the only insecure one. And I would never have guessed, because you are one I admire.
I promise I won't be mad if you don't remember my name. That's what the name tags are for. *grin*

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

I think it would help if I didn't live out in the middle of nowhere.:) Thank goodness for the internet and the great people on it! I really hope we get to meet at some event in the future!

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

I can honestly say I would never have thought you would have a hard time going up to people. I don't think I have ever seen you alone at any of the events we have been to together. It would make sense though that you have that group and you guys are meeting up at said events. Thank you for all your kindness. I think this year besides trying for having more costumes to wear, I need to work on just being more bold.

[myladyswardrobe.livejournal.com]

I've always been shy but in recent years, I've got better. Please don't be nervous about coming up and talking to people. If you start off commenting favourably on what they are wearing, then that will start off a conversation. But also, please don't get worried if they can't talk to you there and then. They may be running off to a class or to teach or to meet someone.

I am sure that happened to me more times than I can count when I was at CoCo in 2009. I had people wanting to talk to me and all I was doing was rushing from one place to another. I am hoping this year, with only teaching ONE class, it will be easier!

PLEASE do come up and talk to me. It would be great to put faces to LJ handles and their real names. ;-)

[theladyrebecca.livejournal.com]

I totally understand feeling awkward in approaching people, since that happens to me too. And since this will be my first year at Costume College, I will definitely be feeling that way. So please approach me!

I also know I will have a hard time remembering and matching people's lj names with faces unless they post pictures of themselves all the time, but I would still love to meet everyone whose ljs I've been following!

[chloeandrudy.livejournal.com]

I've been going to CoCo for 8 years now, and I sometimes STILL feel insecure, although I've gotten better with more practice. But you're right about many of us only get to "see" each other once a year, and with the running back and forth to classes and stuff, it's hard to get more than a few words in, or a hi & by. And I'm crap with names. Thank God for LARGE names on name tags. :O