(no subject)

[llyrafantasyfae]

 I am still fighting pretty hard with the depression. They are messing my meds up, or switching them around I should say so some of it is probably that.
I got my costume college registration! I am so excited about that. There is a lot of classes I am interested in this year. For my Limited classes I picked: 1. Renaissance Partlets, 2. Make a Calash Bonnet, 3. Period Lacings and Points, 4. A pressing Matter. My past two years I have only gotten one off my list but I think I would be pretty happy with any of them. I decided to stray away from the embroidery classes because I wanted to leave my limited class with something close to done... After picking out my classes though a whole new wave of despair hit.

My first thought was I have nothing new and/or pretty to wear. Next was along the lines of I won't have anything by then either cause I suck. I have noticed with Costume College, if you don't have a fab costume, or your own little group already you will pretty much wander around aimlessly. I know a good part of it is my fault with how shy I am so I have a really hard time going up to people myself. But I can keep a conversation going.... if someone comes up to me first.... But how do I do that if I don't have a good costume! Then depressed mind starts crying with frustration. Along with thinking I am just a unlikable person. Thats the only reason people haven't replied to recent updates on LJ... or followed me on my blog.... Right? Then I get mad at myself because you can't just make people like you or be in the cool crowd.. BLAH....

Comments

[mandie-rw.livejournal.com]

Aww! *hugs* Honestly, that's my biggest fear about going to a big costume event, just wandering aimlessly around because I haven't got the, ahem, balls to go talk to groups of costumers who are clearly WAY more fabulous than I ever could hope to be. They all know each other and don't really need another mediocre seamstress around, especially such an awkward, introverted one, right? Actually, that's just me at social events in general. :/ Which is why I probably would end up hiding in my room at CosCon, if I hadn't found a roommate!

Also, you don't suck. Promise. :) I know you don't churn out twenty perfect costumes a year like some people I read on here do - and neither do I! I love the quilts you've made (I have no patience for quilts, so that alone is impressive to me!), and you sew a lot of things for other people. Don't beat yourself up! :)

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

*big hug* I think you hit it exactly on the nail of how I feel. .I haven't got the, ahem, balls to go talk to groups of costumers who are clearly WAY more fabulous than I ever could hope to be. They all know each other and don't really need another mediocre seamstress around, especially such an awkward, introverted one, I think that helps in and of itself to know I am not alone.
Thank you so much, for the compliments also!!!

[mandie-rw.livejournal.com]

No problem. :D Hah, we can be Team Socially Awkward Introverts if we ever get together at an event!

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

ROFL! I will make the badges!

[countessof-roth.livejournal.com]

How about this, if I ever go to CC, I will hang out with you. I don't know if i'll ever make it, but if I do go, I'll so annoy the crap out of you with my constant nattering and blathering!


And i'm not in the cool crowd either costuming or crunchy parenting. I'm Jewish and a nerd and I circumcised my kid and I don't have time to sew anymore for myself, and even if I did, i've developed f**king tendonitis so what's the point.

Your quilts as Mandie said, ROCK MY SOCKS though!!!

[llyrafantasyfae.livejournal.com]

Thanks,
Normally I don't care if I don't fit in. But when I am going someplace were they understand my 'creativity' that most people around me find strange I don't want to be on the outside there also. I am sure you won't annoy me. I will hold you to it, if you ever make it out here!

[sewaddicted.livejournal.com]

As a nerdy introvert (though many of my costume posse don't realise how introvert I fundamentally am) it's really hard to step out of your comfort zone at something like this and approach people when you're convinced they couldn't really be interested in you/your skill level.

But usually they are, they're just often playing catch up. This weekend at the Jane Austen Festival in Canberra because I was catching up with my friends (some of whom have amazing skill & patience) it wouldn't have looked like I'd be the quiet silent one on the fringes if I didn't know anyone. But that's how I'd have been if I didn't know anyone. So I made sure I went up & chatted with some quiet shy people (even though it was awkward for both of us at times). It was really nice when they came & talked to me the next day ... so if any one chats to you that you don't know, go and say hello to them later that day or the next. You may never know if they feel just like you, but are better at hiding it.